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When Work and Family Collide

by Callie Morgan

April 18, 2012

“We’re instructed to do our jobs and love our families (see Colossians 3:23). When you love your job and do your family, you’ve not only stepped outside the bounds of family life, you’ve stepped outside the will of God.” This is my favorite quote from the book I just read written by Andy Stanley. Stanley, who I do believe to be sincerely devoted to his cause, touches on truths that desperately need to be addressed. The prioritization of family is an issue that is causing irreparable damage in families all throughout the world- even families in the church, and it deserves a lengthy discussion. For those who are unfamiliar with the benefits of a solid family life, or unaware of the Scriptural calling for men and women within their homes, this book may be just the nudge that they need to consider the higher purpose that the Lord has called them to. The first couple chapters, though obvious and a little un-intriguing, do offer truth and insight into the heart of a neglected loved one. We are called to recognize the inevitable damage that this negligence  causes, and consider the alternatives to the type of lifestyles that facilitate this type of neglect. Stanley encourages his readers to think about the messages that neglect sends to the offended party, chiefly, “I care about everything else more than you”. He suggests that communicating this breeds insecurity within the home, and then urges his readers to foster love and security in their homes by strategically “taking the household temperature”. He then walks us through a few basic Biblical standards for the family, before building towards practical applications in the final few chapters. I found myself re-reading these last chapters, unsure of the weighty implications he was trying to make.  Did he really need to spend a whole chapter convincing me of the importance of making up my mind? Maybe he did. His theology, which is implied, was a distraction throughout. For example, in chapter 9 he says, “God honors those who honor him.”. I think it is obvious from this statement that he is missing out on some of the beauty and richness of the Gospel. We are fortunate that God’s goodness is not a reaction to our faithfulness or our willingness to involve him in our lives. But rather, God is good to us, simply because He is good.  This is the sort of theological oversight that kept me from fully committing to this book. Like I said previously, I feel that this is a topic worthy of our time and attention. I think it is a hard topic to diligently attend to, and Stanley- like many authors, struggled to properly organize and effectively present it with both precision and thoroughness. Such being the case, I would probably hesitate to recommend this book. Having said that, I also wouldn’t discourage someone from reading it. It provides some elementary food for thought on an important topic…and sometimes that is enough.   I received this book for free from WaterBrook Multnomah Publishing Group for this review. I was not required to give a positive review. All thoughts and opinions are honest and my own.